“Right.” Pierce nodded to Kenzie—not Bowman—and turned and walked away.
Bowman carefully stepped away from her. “Take Ryan home,” he said.
Kenzie didn’t move. “You can’t kill Pierce, you know. You’d have to hold a Choosing for another Guardian, if the Goddess even let you live after that.”
Bowman gave her an annoyed look. “I know.”
“Seriously, it was over a long time ago. I don’t think we had anything to even be over.”
Bowman had started to turn away, but at her words, he swung back, gripped Kenzie by the arms and pulled her against him again.
“You think I can stand knowing any second you could walk away from me, and I wouldn’t be able to stop you?” His fingers bit down. “That if you feel the mate bond with another male, you’ll go—and you won’t care? Do you know what that does to me?”
Bowman released her to put both his hands to his chest, digging into his sweatshirt. “It tears me up inside, right here. It messes with me until I can’t sleep, or think, or feel anything but wanting to grab you and keep you with me no matter what. I’m fucked up because of you, and every time you smile at another male, it fucks me up even more. So have a little pity, all right, Kenz? You’re killing me—a little bit every day.”
Bowman twisted his shirt while Kenzie stared, openmouthed, at him, Then he made a sound of disgust at himself, swung on his heel, and left her.
* * *
Bowman stayed out until very late that night, on into the small hours of the morning. Kenzie heard him return, entering the house quietly.
He did this sometimes when he couldn’t keep his anger down around Kenzie. He’d never disappear for good, she knew, because he wouldn’t leave her or Ryan unprotected. He and Kenzie had to present a united front, no matter what they felt in private, so the other Shifters would remain stable and calm.
The Shifters picked up on any dissonance between the two, instincts making them edgy. After a while those instincts would cancel out any good that Kenzie and Bowman’s mating of convenience had wrought. Shifters could split themselves again between supporting Bowman’s pack or Cristian’s, or splinter into individual clans, each species shutting the others out.
As much as the world tried to humanize Shifters, as much as Shifters presented themselves as human in order to reassure the world, they were still animals. As animals, they had a heightened instinct to survive and to protect their immediate families, at any cost.
Kenzie sat in the dark in bed, her knees drawn up to her chest, as she heard Bowman go into Ryan’s room. She knew he’d cross to the bed and look down at Ryan asleep for a moment, then smooth his hair or press a kiss to his forehead before leaving the room and softly closing the door.
Bowman entered their bedroom, where Kenzie waited, and halted on the threshold. All the lights in the house were out, but Bowman could see fine in the dark.
“I thought you’d be asleep.” He came inside and shut the door, and Kenzie let out her tense breath. She’d worried he’d turn away when he saw her awake, to go sleep on one of the living room couches.
“I couldn’t,” she said. “I wondered if you found out anything.”
“Not much.” Fabric whispered as Bowman’s clothes slid from him, his belt clinking in the darkness. “The driver for the trucking company did steal the truck, but he sold it pretty quickly. Then he got caught boosting another truck and has spent the last six months in prison.” Kenzie heard his jeans hit the floor. “He’s not involved in this, as far as I can tell.”
Kenzie tried to keep her tone conversational as Bowman approached the bed, though her heart was pounding. “Who did he sell the truck to?”
“That’s what we’re trying to find out. Pierce is on it, along with all the Guardians, on their network. I also called Eric and Liam.” He made a sound like a grunt. “Because you know how much I love talking to other Shiftertown leaders.”
Kenzie smothered a laugh. Eric was the leader of the Las Vegas Shiftertown, and a Feline, and Bowman didn’t much like Felines. But then all Shiftertown leaders were competitive with one another. They could work together, but the heightened awareness in a roomful of leaders gave off a distinctive odor.
“Did they know anything?” she asked.
“Nope. They’ve never heard of a creature like it. A griffin, or whatever.”
Bowman got into bed as he spoke, bashing his pillows into shape as usual. Kenzie knew he wouldn’t act awkward, or apologize for his outburst at the arena, or defend himself in any way. He’d carry on as though nothing had happened.
That’s what they always did. If they kept their relationship businesslike, all was well. As soon as they moved into emotions, everything went to hell.
“Both Liam and Eric want to send a couple of their Shifters to help us look around,” Bowman said. “I told them I’d think about it.”
Kenzie adjusted for Bowman’s bulk in the bed, the sheet sliding from her bare torso. “An outsider’s perspective might be useful. They both have good trackers.”
“I said I’d think about it.” Bowman resolutely closed his eyes. “Go to sleep. We have a lot more to do tomorrow.”
He pulled the covers up over his chest and pretended to drift off.
Kenzie sat still and watched him. Her Shifter sight let her see him in the darkness, his bronzed shoulders and hands against the pale sheet, his eyes closed, hiding their glitter from her. His lashes were thick and very black, curling against his tanned face.