My stomach dropped. And the next thing I knew she pushed me, causing my balance to falter just slightly, which would have been fine if a wave hadn’t chosen that exact moment to crash right next to us.

Okay, now I was cold.

“One.” I shouted as I jumped out of the chilling water.

She squealed. “Oh no, Demetri Daniels is counting again.

Two!” She joined in mocking me. She threw her head back and laughed.

This time I didn’t even make it to three. I just tackled her against the sand as the icy water crashed over us.

Chapter Twenty-seven

Alyssa

I couldn’t stop smiling. The hurt that was ever-present, the memorial I kept with me was slowly fading and although I was sad, I felt like it was time. And I had Demetri to thank for it. He made me want to smile. He made me feel like it was okay to be happy.

I twirled in front of the mirror. In a moment of panic I’d texted Holly for help on what to wear for the party. She’d come to my rescue as all girls should when another girl has a fashion crisis, and I was again reminded how much I missed having girlfriends.

“It looks great,” Holly said from my bed. She’d asked if she could come over early and get ready. Apparently Demetri invited the entire group to his party, which was kind of awesome of him.

Could the guy do any wrong? I couldn’t match his personality now with the rumors floating around about him. I’d had a weak moment and searched the Internet at Mom and Dad’s store only to find tons of things I’d rather have not known. It was obvious he had a past, but it wasn’t my business. Besides, his hands were sweating when he asked me to be his date, which meant he was still human, and he was all mine.

“Thanks, Holly.” I walked over the bed and sat. My dress crunched a bit. It was a strapless baby doll style dress. It was black and silver with pieces of hanging material across the bodice making it look kind of grunge and trendy. My heels were red. All in all, it wasn’t something I would normally pick out for myself, but Nat insisted. She had it overnighted just in case it wasn’t the right size, and I needed to get it altered.

It fit perfect, and I felt really confident in it. I even let Holly do some of my makeup. I hoped Demetri would feel proud to have me on his arm.

Holly played with the fringe on her pale pink skirt. She wasn’t talking much.

“Are you feeling okay?” I asked, suddenly concerned when tears welled in her eyes.

She bit her lip and nodded. Strands of her chunky blond- and brown-highlighted hair fell over her eye. “I’m fine, just feeling kind of… off. It’s probably nerves about the party.”

Just then the doorbell rang. “Come on.” I grabbed her hand.

“We’ve gotta get through group first!”

I almost tripped down the stairs. It had been a while since I wore heels. Dad glanced at me just as he reached for the door. His mouth dropped open, he shook his head no a few times and then walked off in a daze.

“I think I just put him in shock,” I said to Holly.

She laughed. “Imagine what it will do to Demetri.”

“That’s probably my dad’s problem — he was imagining what Demetri would do.” He was probably going to complain to my mom later about my dress. But I imagined her hugging me more than reprimanding me.

I opened the door and came face to face with Sam.

“Hey!” I gave him a hug. Geez, if I didn’t stop smiling people were going to think I was on drugs.

“Um, hi.” His eyes took in my dress and then his smile widened. “You look great, Alyssa. Demetri’s going to have a stroke.”

I felt my cheeks heat with embarrassment as I looked away from Sam.

“Can… um…” Sam looked passed me to Holly and then grabbed my arm. “Can we go somewhere and talk really quick?”

“Sure.” I shrugged. “Holly, can you let everyone in?”

“Sure thing.” She saluted as I led Sam away from the door and upstairs to my room.

Once we were inside I closed the door. “What’s up, Sam?”

“I can’t do this.” Sam paced in front of me.

“Do what?” My stomach dropped when I saw his eyes well with tears.

“Damn, I just can’t do it anymore, Alyssa. It’s killing me.

You have no idea! I thought I was protecting you! That’s all I’ve ever done is protect you! Make him into a damn martyr and wait for you to admit it was me you liked, not him. Damn, I knew you loved him. I just wanted you to love me too. But in the end I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t do it. Damn regrets.”

I’d never heard Sam curse. Not once. Was he high? “Sam, what are you talking about?”

“Six years,” he whispered hoarsely. “Six years I’ve been in love with you. The last year you spent with Brady was the hardest.

I mean, he was my little brother. I couldn’t exactly move in on his girlfriend, and then when everything happened, my feelings just faded. I mean, I loved you, but you weren’t you anymore. You know what I mean? The girl I fell in love with died right along with my brother. And it was too damn painful to be around you, because your smile was gone and it was his fault. All his fault. He took his heart with you when he died and I was so afraid you’d never get it back.”

“Why are you telling me this now?” I asked, voice shaking with emotion. I wasn’t sure what I was. Angry? Confused? Hurt?

“Regrets. We’ve been talking about regrets in group. Want to know what mine was?”