Serge was silent.
Looking up at Raze, I said, “Raze, pull back your hood.”
Raze didn’t move for a few long seconds, but he eventually lifted his hand and drew back his hood, his downcast eyes slowly lifting and fixed on Serge.
Serge’s eyes were assessing as he studied Raze up close.
“Sergei?” Raze said, and Serge blanched further at the use of his full first name. He looked at me in disbelief, just as Raze said, “I… I remember you.” Raze gripped my hand and pressed it to his lips, the action almost making me drop to my knees in happiness.
“You would drive me and Kisa to school… and to the beach?”
“Yes,” Serge replied, and I heard the clogging of his throat and saw the tears build in his eyes. “Christ! It is you! You look different, but… yes, it’s you.”
“I told you I’d found him. That he’d come back to us,” I said, and Serge shook his head, astounded.
“We thought you were dead. We were told you’d died in an accident.”
I felt Raze stiffen and I panicked. I’d never talked about the murder or his apparent death. I’d never told him of his family, of Talia, of Ivan, of his mother, who still to this day could not move past the loss of her son. Raze had never mentioned any memory of his family, so I didn’t want to push. I couldn’t bear losing him again if it all became too much and he ran.
“What accident? What death?” Raze asked tightly, and I could see the pain etching his face. It was like it physically pained him to remember his life before becoming a fighter.
Serge’s eyebrows pulled down, and I subtly shook my head, telling him without words to go no further.
Lifting to my tiptoes, I pressed my lips to Raze’s and asked, “Would you go somewhere with me now? Serge will drive us there.”
Raze pulled back and, without hesitation, answered, “Yes.”
Serge made himself busy by opening the back doors of the Lincoln, and we climbed inside.
Raze was tense as he sat in the car and I stroked at his arm. “Are you okay, lyubov moya?”
Raze cleared his throat and shifted on the seat. Placing his hand on my knee, he squeezed. “Cars make me nervous. I… I haven’t been in many, and I don’t like not being in control.”
Picking up his heavy arm, I laid it over my shoulder and cuddled into his waist. Raze’s thumb stroked at my arm, and I sighed. I’d never felt like this. Even as a child, and infatuated with Luka to the level I was, I wasn’t old enough to understand that your feelings can deepen even further with age. I didn’t know believing you had lost your soul mate and then having them re-enter your life made the word ‘relief’ too simple of an emotion, because the reality of having your heart fixed back together was too indescribable for words.
Looking up, I saw Serge casting the odd glimpse at the two of us, and a happy expression filled his face. He’d always loved Luka, and in truth, he’d always hated Alik. I knew that by the way he now looked at me safe in Raze’s arms. It filled him with happiness. I knew he worried what my life would be like with Alik. And tomorrow night, my true love and my fiancé would fight to the death. I almost couldn’t breathe at that thought of that fact, so I chose to block it from my mind and focus on being joined with the other half of my soul right now, right this second. Just living in the moment.
Raze pulled me closer to his side and ran his nose amongst my hair. “We used to sit like this, didn’t we? You under the protection of my arm, safe.”
I smiled against his abs. “Always.”
“I think I remember that.”
“Good, lyubov moya. That’s really good.”
Chapter Seventeen
RAZE
As soon as the car door opened, the familiar smell of the sea hit my nostrils, causing flashbacks to assault my guarded mind.
A boy.
A girl.
The beach.
A late summer’s night.
Kissing… Something more… something big… something life changing… something that made my chest ache… something that just felt right.
Kisa took a red plaid blanket in her hands, yanking me from the memory as Serge opened the door.
“I want to show you somewhere, Raze,” she said, and I got out of the car. I closed my eyes as I heard the sound of the sea waves, as I smelled the salt in the air.
A calm washed over my body as the sea waves crashed against the shore. Hearing people’s voices in the distance, laughing and having a good time, somehow made me feel at home, for the first time ever. I tried to let myself enjoy this. I had never enjoyed… anything; too concerned with fighting, killing, training… revenge to ever let myself just be.