She shook her head. "You're not well enough for that."
"I know, and it's not really why I came here today. I just needed to be with someone who cared about me for a little while."
Bethany's stomach lurched at the sincerity in his voice. "Your family loves you."
"No, they don't. I sometimes pretend they do, but I know better. You and Galen are all I have in this world. And you're the only one who has never hurt me."
Tears pricked her eyes at the raw pain he unknowingly revealed. "I would never hurt you."
"And that's why I came even though I'm fevered. For two weeks I've been with people tending me because they had to. It's very different than being with someone who tends you because you matter to them."
"Hector-"
He placed a finger to her lips to silence her. "I don't want your pity, Beth. I want the fire in you that warms me. I live for your insults and taunts."
"I don't mean them."
"I know. Believe me, I can tell the difference between your good-spirited teasing and the barbs that are meant to bleed me." He pulled her against him. "Just let me hold you for a little while and then I'll leave you in peace."
She set her cloth aside and closed her eyes, savoring the warmth of his fevered body against hers. Her Hector broke her heart and yet he held so much quiet strength that he never ceased to amaze her. She didn't understand the bits of his life he shared. How could his family be so reckless with their care of him?
His heart was so gentle and sweet. He tried so hard to please and take care of others. Why would anyone be unkind to him? But the scars on his body and the inner ones his words betrayed told her exactly how careless and heartless the people around him were.
And she hated them for that.
The mere fact he'd come to her when it was obvious he wasn't fit to travel, and no one had stopped him, said it all. How could they have left him alone in this condition? For even a heartbeat?
She ran her hand over the muscled ripples on his stomach. The heat from his skin was searing. "Have you eaten?"
"Mmm."
She frowned and smiled at his noncommittal answer. "Are you awake?"
"I'm awake," he mumbled.
Bethany toyed with the trail of hair that ran from his navel to his groin.
"If you keep doing that, I'm not going to rest."
She ran her hand down the length of him. He sucked his breath in sharply. "Sorry," she whispered.
"It's all good. Right now, you could set me on fire and I wouldn't complain."
Knowing she should be out looking for Apostolos, she placed a kiss to his hard abdomen. It was so strange how calm he made her. Whenever she was with him, nothing else mattered.
She remembered asking her mother once when she'd been a small child why her mother had chosen an Egyptian god to be her father.
"Gods are boring creatures, Bet. Most are nothing more than spoiled children with powers they never hesitate to use against those weaker. And while your father can be juvenile at times, there is a danger to him. He understands his power and he's fierce with it. More than that, he doesn't prey on those weaker, he only attacks those who are stronger. That was what drew me to him and why I agreed to be the mother of his daughter. His strength, and the fact that never once did he use it against me. Your father is like having a lion for a pet. You know that it's a creature of utter and supreme violence whose mere nature and only talent is murder, and yet it lies down at your side and purrs for your touch alone. There's nothing more titillating.
"But more than that was how your father made me feel. He awoke something inside me that had never lived before. He breathed life into my soul, and I was a better person for having known him. It was why I wanted to have you as a piece of him that I could keep and love even though we weren't allowed to be together. And it's a decision I've never once regretted. Not even when your father almost destroyed our pantheon because Archon refused to allow him access to you. Your father doesn't give his devotion lightly or carelessly. When you are given a piece of someone like that, someone who doesn't naturally trust others, it's more special than when it comes from those who are capricious with their love. As with all things, the rarity makes it all the more precious."
Hector trusted no one. Not even his own family. And he'd never given his heart, body, or his love to any other woman.
Only her.
And while he was young in human years, he held a maturity and understanding far beyond that of any ancient.
Most of all, whenever she was with him, she felt beautiful and powerful. Things that were a given as a goddess and yet ...
She'd never really felt them until he'd stumbled into her world and made her laugh.
That was why she loved him and why she risked the anger of Archon and the others to be with him.
He was worth it.
But in the back of her mind was the fear of how he'd react should he ever learn that she'd lied to him about her identity. He hated the gods and their interference in human lives.
Would he one day learn to hate her, too?
November 15, 9529 BC
Styxx couldn't breathe as Acheron was savagely beaten in the courtyard below. Writhing on his bed, he had a portion of his chlamys in his mouth to keep from crying out from the pain. He fisted his hands in his blanket and arched his back as more blows struck him.
It always hurt when Acheron was beaten, but now ...
Their close physical proximity made it hurt all the more. He'd forgotten that one small fact.
He couldn't imagine what his brother had done to deserve this.
Sure you know ...
His father had been embarrassed somehow. It was the only time they would be beaten like this. And for this long.
Damn it, Acheron.
It'd taken Styxx years to figure out how to stay out of the line of fire. Just as he'd finally learned how to avoid his father's wrath, enter his idiot brother.
At last, it stopped.
Panting and weak, Styxx lay on the bed, aching all over. But it was his back that really burned. Thank the gods he hadn't been in public when it started or he'd be on his way to the temple again to have demons driven out.
He'd barely stopped his hands from shaking when his father threw his door open. Styxx tried to sit up, but the pain was still too much for that.
"Are you ill?"
"Bad stomach," he lied, hoping that would explain the sweat on his brow and pallor of his skin. "Did you need something, Father?"
"I found the bastard out in the square this afternoon. Apparently, he screwed his guards for his freedom. They're to be executed in the morning for their treason, and he's been beaten. Should you see him outside of his room, I want you to have him arrested immediately."
Styxx sighed at the ridiculous fury his father held against Acheron. "Why bother, Father? Just give him his freedom."
"Is that really what you want?"
"Yes. Why not?"
"He bears your face. Anything he does, reflects on you."
"I'm not that concerned about it."
Styxx realized too late that that was the wrong thing to say. His father stormed across the floor and grabbed him up in an angry fist.
"You want them to mock you as a whore? What kind of king would you be? No one would respect you. They damn sure wouldn't listen to you."
And yet some of them had already paid to fuck him ...
"You better learn to care, boy. In the minds of the people, that whore down the hall is you."
Don't do it ... don't say it....
But he couldn't stop himself.
"Maybe you should have thought of that before you had your brother train him and sell him as a whore."
His father backhanded him so hard, it knocked him from the bed.
Gasping, Styxx hit the floor and tried to clear his rattled senses. Before he could, his father kicked him hard in the ribs several times.
"How dare you! I should have you whipped for such impudent defamation!"
Styxx rolled over and looked up at his father. But for once, he didn't taunt him.
"If you want to be known as a whore, maybe I should have put both of you in a stew. Is that what you want?"
Not really.
His father kicked him again. You disgust me. You're not my son. You can't be.
"Get up off that floor. You're a future king, not some groveling peasant."
His body screaming out in protest, Styxx pulled himself to his feet and faced his father.
The king raked him with a look of scorn. "I can't believe I was saddled with you as an heir."
"Then perhaps you should see about acquiring that new queen and fathering more sons."
"Why? So they can grow up and be as big a disappointment to me as you are?"
"What can I say? I always strive to be the best I can at everything I do."
"Then you succeed. For you are truly the greatest mistake of my life. I should have bashed your head in when you were born and saved myself the misery and cost of raising you."
Styxx didn't say another word as his father stormed from his room. Really, what was there to say after that?
Other than he wished his father had bashed his head in, too.
November 20, 9529 BC
Styxx felt the venom of his sister's glare like a sword slicing down his spine. Glancing away from Galen as they trained, he saw Ryssa in the stands with their father, who'd come in earlier to watch them spar and make complaints about the fact that Styxx wasn't training hard enough.
"How can you be a war hero against Atlantis? What? Did they send only their young daughters out to fight you? I swear, I've seen peasants fighting in the street who showed more energy and vigor than you do.
"If you're going to hit like a woman, we should put a peplos on you. At least then, your pretty face and body might stop them from killing you.... Or perhaps we should have you join the Sacred Band of Boeotia and have them assign you a boyfriend who'll be willing to protect your effeminate ass in battle.
"I'm embarrassed I sent you to war after seeing this pathetic display. I should have your armor dismantled or given over to someone who actually knows how to use it and not cause it shame!"
His complaints had been so fierce and foul, Galen had finally gone over to remind his father that barely three weeks ago Styxx had almost died, and that he'd only been out of his bed for a handful of days. The purpose of the exercise was to keep him from losing flexibility and rebuild his damaged muscles. Not prepare for war.
Only then had his father stopped insulting him and allowed them to train in peace.
Styxx frowned as he watched Ryssa screaming. He couldn't hear their rapid-fire conversation, but given the angry way she gestured toward him, he was sure it was about him and Acheron.
Galen lowered his sword as he realized Styxx was distracted. "For once, I'm glad I'm not king."
Styxx laughed. "You've no idea. I've been on the receiving end of her tongue-lashings enough to know it's highly unpleasant. I think he's the one who could use armor."
"Are you the cause of her vexation?"
"Who knows. Could be the wrong material was delivered to her for a dress."
Galen chuckled then jerked his chin back toward them. "Your father must have placated her. She seems pleased enough now."
"It won't last. It never does." He took the wineskin from Galen's hand and slaked his thirst.
"Styxx!"
He winced at his father's bellow. What had the bitch blamed him for now? Returning the wineskin to Galen, he headed over.
"Father?"
"Take my advice ... should you ever have a daughter, marry her off the day she's born."
"I take it Ryssa's visit wasn't pleasant."
"The bastard's being freed and moved to his own room. Just thought you'd want to know."
The bastard. Acheron. Every time his father referred to his brother like that, it was a slap in his face, too, and betrayed what his father truly thought of them both.
Styxx was glad that Ryssa had succeeded where he'd failed, but he knew better than to let his father know his real thoughts.
"I don't see how that affects me."
"It shouldn't, but I wanted you to know about it." And with that, his father left him.
At least his brother would finally have his place again in their home. There was a time when he would have rejoiced over that news.
Now ...
All Styxx felt was sadness. Not because Acheron would have his own room, but because he no longer had a brother. He just had another person in the palace who wished him dead and burned.
No, he thought bitterly. Acheron wished him raped first.
December 5, 9529 BC
Bethany smiled at the sensation of Hector curled against her back as he slept with his arms wrapped around her body. Her head rested on his hard biceps, while his face was buried so deep in her hair that she could feel his breath against her neck. He'd made love to her for so many hours that she still wasn't sure if she'd be able to move later.
Not that she ever wanted to leave this bed, or him again.
In all her life, nothing had made her happier than her mortal. And while the war with the Greeks had ended before they'd been able to spear Prince Styxx's head to the wall, she honestly didn't mind. She wouldn't take anything, even the prince's throat, in exchange for the last few months of having Hector with her in peace.
Nothing compared to these lazy afternoons of being cocooned by his long, hard body. Of tasting his lips that drove away all thoughts except how much she adored him. How much she wanted to have his child....
Don't go there.
She couldn't help it. The more she was with Hector, the more she wanted to have him permanently in her life. Worse, she'd even started dreaming of a future with just the three of them as a family.
How stupid was that? She was a goddess, not some farmer's daughter.
And still those dreams tortured her.
Dynatos started whining and scratching at the door. He'd been so quiet for the last few hours that she'd forgotten he was in the room with them.
The instant she moved to tend him, Hector came awake with a start.
"Beth?" He breathed her name like a beloved prayer.
"Dyna wants out."
He made a disagreeable noise in her hair before he pulled back. "I'll put him outside. You stay in the bed where it's warm."
She smiled at his consideration. "You sure?"
He grumbled under his breath as he rolled away from her. "Yes."
Laughing at his subdued irritation, she pulled the covers up higher. "You don't sound it."
"Keep my place warm and I promise I won't murder your dog for disturbing us."
She listened as he let the dog out then stoked the fire before he returned to bed. He piled the pillows up and reclined against them. "I'm sorry I fell asleep. I hate to squander even one heartbeat of my precious time with you."
She draped herself over his chest so that she could rub her hand against the sharp ridges of his abdomen. The scent of his skin made her crave him inside her again as she dipped her hand lower to stroke him. "I don't mind." Honestly, she adored the fact that he trusted her so completely. She knew how rarely he slept.
He brushed his hand through her hair as he sighed contentedly. "It's late. Well past dark ... can you stay the night with me?"
Bethany hesitated. They rarely spent nights together. Although here lately, they'd done so a lot more often as their days were so much shorter.
Still, she was supposed to be searching for Apostolos. "How late?"
"I'm not sure, but the moon was rather high."
"Will you not be in trouble with you father?"
He didn't hesitate with his answer. "I would brave a thousand angry fathers for more time with you, my Beth."
"Then I shall stay."
Styxx smiled in relief. He never liked for her to travel late on her own. Not even with Dynatos as her guardian. He didn't trust the world to leave his Beth unharmed.
Fingering her cheek, he savored the sensation of her breath falling against his skin. This was what he'd craved most while he'd been at war. What he'd tried his best to hold onto. Not just the ability to make love to her, but the closeness he felt whenever her limbs were tangled with his. The feeling that they, together, formed a single, whole heart. It was the emotional intimacy that meant as much, if not more, than the physical. The fact that he could talk to her about anything and not have her judge him.
That she, alone, loved him and welcomed him to her life.
She pulled back from him and unhooked the necklace her father had given to her.
"What are you doing?"
She coiled it around his wrist again. "I want you to wear this."
"Beth-"
She stopped his protest with a kiss. "I have a bad feeling, Hector. And I don't know why. I have Dynatos to protect me. I don't want to leave you with nothing. So, please ... Take it. Let it protect you when I'm not around."
"Only to make you happy, my lady, and because it reminds me of you when you're not with me." Not to mention, he couldn't count how many times he'd started to stroke it out of habit, and had felt crushed that it was gone. During his time at war, it'd been the only thing that had comforted him. No matter how bad things had been, he'd look at her necklace and feel better instantly. It'd been in his life so long that it had become a part of him.
Like her.
She smiled. "I do love you."
"And I, you." He kissed her gently and inhaled the sweet scent of her skin. "Marry me, Beth," he breathed before he could stop himself.
She pulled back with a sharp frown. "Hector-"
"I won't stifle you. I swear it. But I need you, Bethany. When you're not with me, I exist as a shade. A mere shadow of a human."
"You know I can't, Hector."
Styxx ground his teeth. Like her, he had a bad feeling he couldn't shake, and it wasn't just because his sister was about to be tied to a god who refused to leave him in peace. It was a sense that Bethany wouldn't be with him much longer. That something was going to divide them.
He just didn't know what.
"I wish you didn't have to leave," he whispered. She'd told him earlier that she'd be traveling with her father for the next few weeks. "I shall miss you terribly."
"Not nearly as much as I'll miss you. But I will be back as soon as I can."
Styxx sighed as she dropped her hand to cup him gently in her palm. As bad as he hated whenever he had to leave her, it was so much more painful for her to leave him. At least, when he left, he knew he'd be back, no matter what.
With her ...
He could only hope that she'd return. "I will count the heartbeats until I see you again."
"And I will make your count as brief as possible. I promise."
Closing his eyes, he savored her fingers stroking him as much as he did those precious words. At least he had her tonight. He wouldn't think about the morrow. It would come.
His only hope was that it would treat him much better than the past had.
And that Bethany kept her promise to return to him.
December 9, 9529 BC
Styxx stood to his father's right-hand side as they waited for another royal entourage that had been sighted heading for the palace. Just what Styxx had been dying for, more witnesses to Ryssa's desecration in two days.
During the last week dignitaries had been arriving from all over Greece, and as prince, Styxx was expected to meet every one. And he looked forward to these wonderful moments as much as he did Apollo's midnight visits to his bed.
Meanwhile, his father's private words and insults rang in his ears, making these moments all the "sweeter." The more his father saw Acheron, the more he detested Styxx. And there was nothing he could do nowadays to placate the man. His father was absolutely determined to hate him.
Truthfully, he no longer cared. He merely treated these days as he'd done the endless months of war. He buried his emotions deep and just got through them as mechanically as possible, on the promise that he'd soon be with Bethany, and she would be able to erase the misery and replace it with emotions worth feeling.
But as Styxx saw the banners of their latest guests, he couldn't help feeling a little better.
King Kreon of Halicarnassus. Styxx hadn't seen him since he'd fought to repel the Atlanteans from Kreon's kingdom. The man had been kind to him and his soldiers, and he'd appreciated it.
As soon as the retinue stopped, the king of Halicarnassus and his court left their chariots and walked up the palace steps.
Kreon gave a curt nod to his father then turned to Styxx and smiled wide before he pulled him into a fatherly embrace. "It's so good to see you again, Highness. And I swear by Zeus, I think you've grown even taller. You're looking very fit, indeed."
Styxx smiled. "And you, Majesty. You had a safe journey, I trust?"
"Could have been better. Could have been worse. Remind me in a bit, I have brought gifts for you, young prince."
Styxx glanced to his father who wasn't pleased in the least. "I appreciate it, Sire. Thank you."
Kreon clapped him on the back. Then he turned toward his father. "Your son is the only thing of yours I envy, Xerxes. I hope to the gods you appreciate the gift you've been given."
You don't have to live with the little prick and his mouth. Or put up with his lazy sullenness.
Styxx stiffened at his father's silent insults.
As the kings ascended the stairs, he followed them in, but hung back. The palace was far too crowded now. The voices were more than he could bear and he had no way to blot them out.
Intent on his room, he didn't pay attention to anyone until he ran into his sister.
Literally.
Ryssa glared her hatred. You did that on purpose, didn't you, you giant oaf!
Styxx grimaced at the pain her angry thoughts added to his pounding head. "It was an accident, sweet sister. Forgive me."
"Acheron's right. You are an asshole."
He sighed. "It does my heart good to know the fond discussions my siblings hold of me in my absence."
"You think this is funny, don't you?"
"There are very few things in life I find amusing, Ryssa. And I can assure you, none of the few have anything to do with my family."
She raked him with a lethal sneer. "You should be afraid, Styxx."
Oh, this had to be good. "Of?"
"If I please Apollo, I will have much more power than you do. And since he's the god of plagues, I could make your life miserable. I will have the ability to hurt you in places you won't forget."
Styxx laughed bitterly at her empty threat. He should be so lucky, but Apollo wasn't about to break his current toy. The gods knew, Styxx had been trying to repel the god for months now.
But that wasn't what really bothered him about her words. It was Ryssa's blind stupidity that offended him most. "Dearest sister, you've held that power over me all my life and have never once hesitated to use it."
December 11, 9529 BC
His stomach churning, Styxx left Apollo's temple while his sister was being offered to the god. In spite of what Ryssa thought, he couldn't bear to see it. Not that the bitch didn't deserve this fate and more.
But what truly sickened him were the smirks and amused glances Apollo kept passing to him during the ceremony. The god thought it was funny that everyone made such a big deal of tying Ryssa to him when it wasn't the princess the Olympian really craved.
Styxx flinched as he saw Apollo in his mind, grabbing him right before it'd started and shoving him back against the temple wall in the secluded private area.
"I may be with your sister tonight, prince, but it's your lips I'll be thinking of when I kiss her. Your hard, muscled body I'll be hungering for..."
The only thing that had saved Styxx from having a worse memory had been his father's impeccable timing. He could still see his father's bemused stare as he'd stumbled upon them and dragged his gaze from Apollo, who had both his hands fisted in Styxx's gold-trimmed, white chiton as he held him pinned to the wall with his leg between Styxx's thighs and his head bent low to whisper in Styxx's ear. Styxx, who'd been cringing at Apollo's close proximity, had his head turned away from the god and his hands splayed on the wall beside him.
With a low, private laugh in Styxx's ear, Apollo had covertly rubbed himself against Styxx's hip so that he could feel how hard the god was for him. Then he released Styxx and walked off as if nothing had happened.
Pushing himself away from the wall, Styxx had met his father's angry glare.
"Did you offend Apollo, boy?"
No, the bastard offends me.
"Nay, Father." The steadiness of his voice had surprised him.
His eyes darkening with rage, the king had closed the distance between them so he could snarl privately at Styxx. "You do anything to screw this up for me, and I swear I will see you disowned and on the street with your whore brother. You think you know what tragedy is, boy ... you can't imagine. And don't you believe for one minute that Kreon or any of the other kings would welcome you to their kingdoms. If I threw you out, none of them would dare speak to you. Ever."
His father's jealousy had stunned him. Not that it mattered. He really couldn't care less at this point. "I promise you, Father, Apollo isn't angry at me."
Then the part of him that wanted to lash out at his father and hurt him couldn't resist adding, "He was embracing me. That's what you saw. He was merely telling me how much he looked forward to spending more time with me in the future."
"Good. See to it, it stays that way."
Tears had pricked the backs of his eyes as his father had stormed off. But what hurt most wasn't that his father was selling his son and daughter to Apollo for the benefit of his people or for peace.
He was doing it for bragging rights with the other kings so that he could claim Didymos was the city-state most favored by the gods.
Unable to deal with it anymore, Styxx headed for the small corner apothecary that specialized in herbs and medicines from Atlantis. Even though he hated what the herbs did to him and had sworn he wouldn't touch them again, he needed something to get everything out of his head. Just for a little while.
I can't believe I killed my uncle for this shit.
But then maybe that was why the gods had done this to him. It was recompense for his actions. All the things he'd killed Estes to prevent had happened anyway, only now they were so much worse. Ryssa was still being whored, and instead of Styxx being held and raped for one week out of the year, he was now at Apollo's mercy anytime the god had a hard-on.
Only Acheron's situation had improved.
His head throbbing, Styxx walked through the marketplace, toward the shop.
Right now, all he really wanted was to be with Bethany. She would ease the pain in his heart and make him forget for a few minutes how much he hated every part of royal life. But she wouldn't be back for a week. Her family was traveling and she'd left him bereft without the brightness of her smile. Honestly, he couldn't stand not being with her.
But at least she took Dynatos with her everywhere she went. She kept the massive dog close to her so that Styxx could breathe, knowing Dynatos would always protect her.
"Please, sir ... can I not buy half the loaf?"
Styxx paused at a girl's voice as he passed the baker's stand.
"Get on with you! I don't want a beggar here. Coin or nothing. I don't sell half loaves."
"But I don't have enough. Please. It's for my mother. She's sick and starving...."
The lecherous look on the man's face as he swept the young teen's body made Styxx's stomach turn. "If you want to pay with something other than coin, we might have a deal, girl."
Horrified, she stumbled away and started to turn then she closed her eyes.
Rage darkened Styxx's gaze as he saw what she was about to do to feed her family.
As she stepped back toward the stand, Styxx cut her off. He knelt on one knee in front of her so that she could look him in the eyes. "Get what you need and I will pay for it."
The suspicion in those young, brown eyes shredded his heart. "And what do you want me to pay you with, my lord?"
Those words and what she was really asking thoroughly pissed him off at the Fates who would do this to a child so young. "Nothing. I swear." He handed her a basket. "Get whatever you need to feed your family."
When she started away, Styxx caught a flash of gold around her neck. Stopping her, he pulled a tattered string to find a large gold ring tied at the end of it.
A soldier's ring.
"Please don't take that," she whispered. "It's all I have left of my father."
Recognition slammed into his gut like a fist as he saw the markings he knew as well as his own. They had adorned a shield that had stood at his side and back in many a battle. "Gaius? Son of Philoctes? Was he your father?"
"Did you know him, my lord?"
Anger and grief almost brought tears to his eyes as he remembered Gaius and his kindness with the cloak. "You must be Helen."
A bright smile finally made her appear to be the young girl she was. "You did know my father!"
Styxx returned her smile. "Yes, I did. He told me much of you and your brothers, and baby sister, and mother, and how much he loved all of you." He placed the ring in her hand. "And he was a great friend to me. Now gather your items, Helen. Whatever you need or want. Have no fear of the cost. Now or later."
Tears filled her eyes. "Thank you, my lord."
He kissed her on the brow then stood while she quickly shopped.
The baker scoffed as he watched her fill her basket. "She's not that pretty, my lord."
Lowering his cowl to expose the gold laurel crown he seldom wore, Styxx arched a regal brow at the man.
The baker fell to his knees. "Highness ... forgive me. I didn't recognize you without your guard."
Helen froze then, eyes wide, gaped. "You're Prince Styxx?"
"I am."
She bowed then curtsied then bowed again.
Styxx laughed. "You don't have to bow to me, Helen. As I said, your father was a good friend to me, and I consider you and yours family."
That only confused her more.
Closing the distance between them, he brushed the dark hair back from her cheek. "Think of me like your cousin."
"I don't like my cousin very much. He smells, and insults me."
"Then think of me as the cousin who doesn't smell or insult you."
Nodding, she quickly finished her shopping.
Styxx passed an irritated look at the baker. "Have her bill sent to my scribe at the palace, and in the future, anything she or her mother needs or wants is to be billed to me. Understood?"
"Yes, Your Highness."
Taking the basket from her, Styxx held his hand out for her. She bit her lip and hesitated. Then she wiped it off on her himation, and placed it into his.
As she led him to her home, he noticed the way she slowed down as they passed a fruit stand.
"Would you like some apples or figs?"
She bit her lip again. "May I?"