"I don't think so."
"Well, he got on this health kick. What started it was he quit smoking. I never smoked so I never had to quit, but he quit and then it was one thing after another. He lost a lot of weight, he changed his diet, he started jogging. He looked terrible, he looked all drawn, you know how guys get? But he was happy, he was really pleased with himself. Wouldn't go drinking, just order one beer and make it last, or he'd have one and then switch to club soda. The French stuff. Perrier?"
"Uh-huh."
"Very popular all of a sudden, it's plain soda water and it costs more than beer. Figure it out and explain it to me sometime. He shot himself."
"O'Bannon?"
"Yeah. I don't mean it's connected, losing the weight and drinking club soda and killing himself. The life you lead and the things you see, I'll tell you, a cop goes and eats his gun, I never figure it requires an explanation. You know what I mean?"
"I know what you mean."
He looked at me. "Yeah," he said. "Course you do." And then the conversation took a turn in another direction, and a little while later, with a slab of hot apple pie topped with cheddar in front of Diebold and coffee poured for both of us, he returned to the subject of Tommy Tillary, identifying him as my friend.
"Sort of a friend," I said. "I know him around the bars."
"Right, she lives up in your neighborhood, doesn't she? The girlfriend, I forget her name."
"Carolyn Cheatham."
"I wish she was all the alibi he had. But even if he got away from her for a few hours, what was the wife doing during the burglary? Waiting for Tommy to come home and kill her? I mean, take it to extremes, say she hides under the bed while they rifle the bedroom and get their prints on everything. They leave, she calls the cops, right?"
"He couldn't have killed her."
"I know, and it drives me crazy. How come you like him?"
"He's not a bad guy. And I'm getting paid for this, Jack. I'm doing him a favor, but it's one I'm getting paid for. And it's a waste of my time and his money anyway, because you haven't got a case against him."
"No."
"You don't, do you?"
"Not even close." He ate some pie, drank some coffee. "I'm glad you're getting paid. Not just because I like to see a guy turn a buck. I'd hate to see you bust your balls for him for free."
"I'm not busting anything."
"You know what I mean."
"Am I missing something, Jack?"
"Huh?"
"What did he do, steal baseballs from the Police Athletic League? How come you've got the red ass for him?"
He thought it over. His jaws worked. He frowned.
"Well, I'll tell you," he said at length. "He's a phony."
"He sells stock and shit over the phone. Of course he's a phony."
"More than that. I don't know how to explain it so it makes sense, but shit, you were a cop. You know how you get feelings."
"Of course."
"Well, I get a feeling with that guy. There's something about him that's wrong, something about her death."
"I'll tell you what it is," I said. "He's glad she's dead and he's pretending he isn't. It gets him out of a jam and he's glad, but he's acting like a sanctimonious son of a bitch and that's what you're responding to."
"Maybe that's part of it."
"I think it's the whole thing. You're sensing that he's acting guilty. Well, he is. He feels guilty. He's glad she's dead, but at the same time he lived with the woman for I forget how many years, he had a life with her, part of him was busy being a husband while the other part was running around on her-"
"Yeah, yeah, I follow you."
"So?"
"It's more than that."
"Why does it have to be more? Look, maybe he did set up Cruz and whatsisname-"
"Hernandez."
"No, not Hernandez. What the hell's his name?"
"Angel. Angel eyes."
"Herrera. Maybe he set them up to go in, rob the place. Maybe he even had it in the back of his mind she might get in the way."
"Keep going."
"Except it's too iffy, isn't it? I think he just feels guilty for wishing she'd get killed, or being glad of it after the fact, and you're picking up on the guilt and that's why you like him for the murder."
"No."
"You sure?"
"I'm not sure that I'm sure of anything. You know, I'm glad you're gettin' paid. I hope you're costin' him a ton."
"Not all that much."
"Well, soak him all you can. Because at least it's costin' him money, even if that's all it's costin' him, and it's money he doesn't have to pay. Because we can't touch him. Even if those two changed their story, admitted the killing and said he put 'em up to it, that's not enough to put him away. And they're not gonna change their story, and who would ever hire them to commit murder anyway, and they wouldn't take a contract like that. I know they wouldn't. Cruz is a mean little bastard but Herrera's just a stupid guy, and- aw, shit."
"What?"
"It just kills me to see him get away with it."
"But he didn't do it, Jack."
"He's gettin' away with something," he said, "and I hate to see it happen. You know what I hope? I hope he runs a red light sometime, in that fucking boat of his. What's it, a Buick he's got?"
"I think so."
"I hope he runs a light and I tag him for it, that's what I hope."
"Is that what Brooklyn Homicide does these days? A lot of traffic detail?"
"I just hope it happens," he said. "That's all."
Chapter 12
Diebold insisted on driving me home. When I offered to take the subway he told me not to be ridiculous, that it was midnight already and I was in no condition for public transportation.
"You'll pass out," he said, "and some bum'll steal the shoes off your feet."
He was probably right. As it was I nodded off during the ride back to Manhattan, coming awake when he pulled up at the corner of Fifty-seventh and Ninth. I thanked him for the ride, asked him if he had time for a drink before he went back.
"Hey, enough's enough," he said. "I can't go all night like I used to."
"You know, I think I'll call it a night myself," I said.
But I didn't. I watched him pull away, started walking to my hotel, then turned and went around the corner to Armstrong's. The place was mostly empty. I went in, and Billie gave me a wave.
I went up to the bar. And she was there at the end of the bar, all alone, staring down into the glass on the bar in front of her. Carolyn Cheatham. I hadn't seen her since the night I'd gone home with her.
While I was trying to decide whether or not to say anything, she looked up and her eyes met mine. Her face was frozen with stubborn old pain. It took her a blink or two to recognize me, and when she did a muscle worked in her cheek and tears started to form in the corners of her eyes. She used the back of her hand to wipe them away. She'd been crying earlier; there was a tissue crumpled on the bar, black with mascara.
"My bourbon-drinking friend," she said. "Billie," she said, "this man is a gentleman. Will you please bring my gentleman friend a drink of good bourbon?"
Billie looked at me. I nodded. He brought a couple of ounces of bourbon and a mug of black coffee.
"I called you my gentleman friend," Carolyn Cheatham said, "but that has an unintentional connotation." She pronounced her words with a drunk's deliberate care. "You are a gentleman and a friend, but not a gentleman friend. My gentleman friend, on the other hand, is neither."
I drank some of the bourbon, poured some of it into the coffee.
"Billie," she said, "do you know how you can tell that Mr. Scudder is a gentleman?"
"He always removes his lady in the presence of a hat."
"He is a bourbon drinker," she said.
"That makes him a gentleman, huh, Carolyn?"
"It makes him a far cry removed from a hypocritical scotch-drinking son of a bitch."
She didn't speak in a loud voice, but there was enough edge to her words to shut down conversations across the room. There were only three or four tables occupied, and the people sitting at them all picked the same instant to stop talking. For a moment the taped music was startlingly audible. It was one of the few pieces I could identify, one of the Brandenburg concertos. They played it so often there that even I was now able to tell what it was.
Then Billie said, "Suppose a man drinks Irish whiskey, Carolyn. What does that make him?"
"An Irishman," she said.
"Makes sense."
"I'm drinking bourbon," she said, and shoved her glass forward a significant inch. "God damn it, I'm a lady."
He looked at her, then looked at me. I nodded, and he shrugged and poured for her.
"On me," I said.
"Thank you," she said. "Thank you, Matthew." And her eyes started to water, and she dug a fresh tissue from her bag.
She wanted to talk about Tommy. He was being nice to her, she said. Calling up, sending flowers. But it just wouldn't do if she made a scene around the office, and he just might have to testify how he spent the night his wife was killed, and he had to keep on the good side of her for the time being.
But he wouldn't see her because it wouldn't look right. Not for a new widower, not for a man who'd been virtually accused of complicity in his wife's death.
"He sends flowers with no card enclosed," she said. "He calls me from pay phones. The son of a bitch."
"Maybe the florist forgot to enclose a card."
"Oh, Matt. Don't make excuses for him."
"And he's in a hotel, of course he would use a pay phone."
"He could call from his room. He as much as said he didn't want the call to go through the hotel switchboard, in case the operator's listening in. There was no card with the flowers because he doesn't want anything in writing. He came to my apartment the other night, but he won't be seen with me, he won't go out with me, and- oh, the hypocrite. The scotch-drinking son of a bitch."
Billie called me aside. "I didn't want to put her out," he said, "a nice woman like that, shitfaced as she is. But I thought I was gonna have to. You'll see she gets home?"
"Sure."
First I had to let her buy us another round. She insisted. Then I got her out of there and walked her around the corner to her building. There was rain coming, you could smell it in the air, and when we went from Armstrong's air conditioning into the sultry humidity that heralds a summer storm it took some of the spirit out of her. She held my arm as we walked, gripped it with something on the edge of desperation. In the elevator she sagged against the back panel and braced her feet.
"Oh, God," she said.
I took the keys from her and unlocked her door. I got her inside. She half sat, half sprawled on the couch. Her eyes were open but I don't know if she saw much through them. I had to use the bathroom, and when I came back her eyes were closed and she was snoring lightly.
I got her shoes off, moved her to a chair, struggled with the couch until I managed to open it into a bed. I put her on it. I figured I ought to loosen her clothing, and while I was at it I undressed her completely. She remained unconscious throughout the operation, and I remembered what a mortician's assistant had told me once about the difficulty of dressing and undressing the dead. My gorge rose at the image and I thought I was going to be sick, but I sat down and my stomach settled itself.